"If you stop banging your head it will feel better you know Halle."
"I have to know her. She is out there somewhere."
"Who are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about the person we might have been if I had broken through that armour we put on forty some-odd years ago to find a way to live our life in a female body as we should have."
"You have been looking for her for years now. Isn't it time to give up? What good could it do? More regrets to get over. Anyway, you know what the world was like for any woman back in the 1960's and 70's. Do you really think we might have survived long if we had transitioned back then?"
"What about the woman in the book we just read? She has had an amazing life! She transitioned at around the same time we might have, and she didn't just survive."
"You weren't paying attention to those parts where she just managed to hang on by her fingernails obviously. "
"Should a real life be easy or simple? No. A real life has challenges and she lived them and survived and thrived."
The Musings of Maria is autobiographical, but more. It is a fulfillment of a promise and a challenge driven by a perspective that I might have had, but never had. It is worth reading for yourself, if only to imagine what was and is, not simply what could have been.