It is hard to move beyond some parts of your life; things you have done, said, and even things you have been will haunt you like a ghost.
The way you felt about yourself and your life can leave you with health issues to deal with. Some of us drink, eat, or even take controlled substances to numb. If we have done these things for a long time, we may have mobility issues. Habits of a lifetime are hard to break. Friendships ruined are difficult or impossible to mend. Family might be lost or at least relationships become so damaged that there seems to be no way past the divisions.
Who we are seems to be a combination of all of these things, some of them hard or even impossible to shake. If I am a recovering drug or alcohol abuser, I will always have to own that. Every day, every moment is my time to show resolve to be the person I am now, and not someone who suffered in circumstances I have moved beyond.
What we do now, what we say and believe now is what needs to matter to us. We must own all of who we are and that must include what we bring with us, no matter how painful.
For your own good, own it all, and move past and beyond to show yourself and the world who you really should have been all along.