"The unexamined life is not worth living" Socrates

- - scatterings of ideas sent to my younger self, a sensitive girl who was fooled into believing she was a boy because of anatomy - -

Thursday, 27 May 2010

Can't Live Without Them - Conversation Part 3

(continued from Part 2)

Pictures and feelings and EMOTIONS; all way over the top! This lady is on overdrive all of the time; demanding that I "get busy and put it all into words, NOW!"

That mistress part has never been truer than these last few years. It is just like it was when we were a child, only worse because she loves everything SO MUCH, and she wants to be SO HAPPY and send messages to ALL OF OUR WONDERFUL SISTERS! all of the time, all of a sudden.

Where did this come from lady??? Unbelievable, how she let me know, in no uncertain terms that we were going to start making comment and sending emails and now we must write a web-log of ALL THINGS, under her name? Do you remember that line from ‘Ghost Busters’?


I am no zombie, believe me, but sometimes it would be nice if she could just stay asleep until past five in the morning. Like a little kid, she is, so full of ideas and fun and “please, can’t we get up and write this down NOW so we don’t forget like we always used to?”

No, I do not hate this lady. Sometimes I wish she could filter, just a little. But that is my job, and you know what? I honestly think I am having a good time here, so let’s let her go for a while, and see where it takes us. Life should be an adventure, you know. Maybe that is what she wants after all of those years, serving my purpose of getting on with doing what we had to do. Now she would like to have a bit of fun. If only she could send me images of something very macho that we’d like to emulate. It is always dresses, and high heels and hair that is like a halo with lots of waves and curls. Lots of bling, please.

Petra and Stana, you aren’t helping me out here, but you make her very happy.

Excuse me now, I need to try to send a message, and she is tired, and has had her way for the last couple of hours, so it’s hard to get her attention.

Hello in there! We are a man! Remember? Hello!

She isn’t paying the least bit of attention.


  1. Well, you know what, you are not totally MAN, you are who you are, a mixture of very feminine and some small doses of masculine. This person has adapted to this new female environment, or self, or whatever you want to been seen as. You are morphing into the person that shows how good and really are.

    It get much more difficult to stuff your female genie person back behind your emotional wall, or into her box if you will. She doesn't fit anymore, something of her will always be reflected on your other self. You just have to learn how to incorporate her stuff with the other person until She completely takes over, and believe me, she will and others will love her for being honest.

  2. She SO doesn't fit back in behind that wall, Sarah. Thank you for the encouraging words.

  3. It's true, you can't put her back in the box once she's escaped!

  4. It seems you are having fun finding and exploring who you really are. I think when these two parts become one you will be one happy bunny.

  5. Lisa, happy bunny sounds very good. I will think happy thoughts! :)

  6. I think we all know "her", Halle.

    A rather pushy girl, isn't she?

    Calie xxx