"The unexamined life is not worth living" Socrates

- - scatterings of ideas sent to my younger self, a sensitive boy who often thought he should have been a girl - -

Tuesday, 6 March 2012

Fearless and Authentic

I am older than most of the population of the planet, and much older than most transsexuals who will transition. It may not be something you have noticed, but I make a real effort to never write as though anything going on here is somehow advice for anyone else.

It seems to me my situation is as unique as yours, so what I write about is just that; something that is working for me.

Recently I have been watching the YouTube postings of a young woman named Charlotte. Her video posts are informative, and enjoyable and she always says what she thinks and seems to make it clear that they are just that; what she thinks. I like Charlotte and respect her.

Any understanding about my own transsexual nature is a result of paying attention to many sources (many thanks to you all), then working hard to really listen to what my heart and head were telling me.

If you have followed here for a while, you know that my dreamtime conversations with younger versions of myself has been a prominent part of that process. There has been a voice I have tried to ignore there in dreamtime. She is the me who transitioned at an early age. I do not know what she calls herself, but living in some alternate now, she is a Halle who did not deny, for whatever reason, and got the help necessary to avoid posing as a male for so very long. From time to time it has been tempting to let her talk to me, as painful as it might be, and tell me of life lived fearlessly and  authentically.

In a way, watching Charlotte's videos has taken the place of listening to that dreamtime younger and transitioned me. I hope "alternative Halle" in her world is as confident and interesting as Charlotte seems to be in this one.

One of her posts, "Fear Mongering In The Community" has me shuddering in worry that some young transsexual might go into denial out of fear as I did, because of something written here.

We need to support each other in any way we can. That doesn't mean 'cheer-leading'. It also does not mean 'fear-mongering'.

This is my wish ~ to encourage every person, myself include, to seek out an authentic self, and get the help they need to be that person, without guilt or fear.

Hope you enjoy watching Charlotte. :-)