"The unexamined life is not worth living" Socrates

- - scatterings of ideas sent to my younger self, a sensitive girl who was fooled into believing she was a boy because of anatomy - -

Sunday, 6 June 2010

Don't Look Down?

“So, what else is new with you these days?” asks a friend… “Oh, not very much.” I lie.
These days, I need to be much more careful than ever before. Even as a child, I wouldn’t tell lies if I could avoid it, because keeping a story straight was hard work, and getting caught was very stressful. Now I remember those times oh so well, and cannot do anything about it.

Luckily, I chose a name that I rarely hear spoken in my ‘real’ life. I can imagine the horror if someone at a party, after I’d had a glass or two of wine, called “Halle”. I watch myself in slow motion, as I turn and respond, ‘yes?”.

Last night, it was a real situation that got me thinking about this. I began to be very quiet, then caught myself and put on my best facade, as friends started talking about the blogs they and their family are writing. As they filled me in on all the details, like how many followers they have, and so on, all this guy could do is sit and nod his head and play really, really dumb about all that ‘blogging stuff’. “Oh really, and how does that work?”… “and you can find out where people are who read it? Really? That must be interesting.”

Maybe it might have been more fun, if lately it had not already been on my mind that my personality is evolving in a very definite “Halle” direction.

It was a wide board for a while, but it is starting to feel more like a narrow gauge wire that I am walking, and looking down to check might be disastrous. Not looking may also be deadly. If this wire turns to air one day; PHT! G’bye façade and all the safety it represents.

Hi, I’m Ha….er, ….


  1. When I started reading blogs some time ago, I noticed how many similarities there is between them and myself. Such as it is here. Just last night at the support group, people were asking me if I had any support structure to fall back on if I should lose my job when I officially make the announcement. Not yet, is my standard reply. They know how I push the envelope with my boss. Without fail, one person always says the same thing to me. 'It could happen at any time and sooner than you think.' If this should happen, can we both go over the edge holding hands like Thelma and Louise?

  2. Well as the Girl Guides (that's what we call them up here in the Great White North) say in their motto; 'Be Prepared!"

    If we are considering these various possibilities in our lives, maybe we will head them off, or at least will have a strategy a bit more long term than 'over the edge' offers.

    If we must go, I'd be pleased to go together, LeAnne!

  3. Well, you can at last relish in the thought that YOUR blog has much more good stuff in it than those blogs everyone else was talking about. It would have been nice to relate that to them, eh?

  4. You know it Calie!

    Hey! you used 'eh' like a true Canadian! :)

  5. And, it was not just coincidence, Halle. I have just been around too many of my friends from the Great White North.

    Calie xxx